Whoever comes first

Whoever comes first, I would marry you,

Either of you since this is where I end.

I call it a chance.

I call it fate.

Whoever comes first, I would care for you,

Either of you, since this is where I begin.

I call it a stance.

I call it a date.

Whoever comes first, I would live with you, always.

Either of you, since this is where I return.

I call it a dance.

I call it a gate.

Whoever comes first, I would love you always,

Either of you, since this is where I belong.

I call it a trance.

I call it a mate.

Whoever comes first, I would be honest with you,

Either of you, since this is where I grow.

I call it a glance.

I call it a wait.

Whoever comes first, I would be clear with you,

Either of you, since I do not discriminate.

I call it a balance.

I call it a fate.

Whoever comes first, I would wish to be friends with you,

Either of you, since I respect and want an end to this game,

I call it a zeal, a parlance.

I call it a latte.

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Sometimes

Some of us live sometime,

Some of us live always,

Some of us live never,

Some of us live less.

What can I do for it?

What can I do then?

It was not right,

What you did.

It was not right,

What you thought.

It was right,

you created a raucous.

It was wrong,

you created a focus.

What can I do for it?

What can I do then?

It is sometimes that we

cannot cross the barriers.

some people, their love

or their hatred.

We cannot cross these men,

since they do not want to leave.

If they do not leave, they can stay.

But, if one wants to stay,

Is it not good to know how

I want to stay with a person.

How I want to take a person.

After all, every attachments requires

two to make it seem like it’s joined.

What can I do for it?

What can I do then?

Now, when they don’t come.

What do you do?

Do you go, stay, create, fake some.

What do you say?

Okay, come let’s see if it works

But then again they don’t come.

But again they don’t turn.

What can I do for it?

What can I do then?

Love is like

Love is like salt,

It creates a taste.

Love is like sugar,

Do not haste.

Love for him

was warm and whims.

Someone’s love for me

was unknown and free.

But, then the man who hid

all this while under the lid.

The man who showed up

to me like a cup.

Life can be confusing at times.

Yet, I respect your feelings,

still now. You could talk to me

like a friend in the making.

But, you chose not to, though

I was there to listen.

You can still come back

Lay your heart bare on the stack.

I would listen to you still

not doing a favour.

Not intending to savour

Just like a man talks to the woman

If at all he likes her,

We can create a bond, a holy matrimony.

For my love can’t stay, taken he stands aloof.

But, yours can, if I choose you,

We all have darkness and dampness.

I too, have them as my sharpness.

If you can see through me.

If you do not want to flee from me?

Love for me was already taken,

I am not at all shaken

For love once for him was true.

But if love for you is also true,

Then let’s get bonded, slowly pure.

I will spend my life, strive

through my ways, till I go back

where I began, if the one I love

and one who loves me does not turn up.

I am free yet I respect you both.

If I am with the one I love,

I will live till the end with you only if you come.

If I live with the one who once claimed to love me.

I will live till the end with you only if you come.

Love is not coming my way

Love is not coming my way

in forms it exists around my pay.

I pay to eat, I pay to sleep,

I pay to be happy,

I pay when I am sad too.

I always pay, when I have none.

I pay in kind if I can’t pay cash.

I pay to unwind and be a dash.

I pay to be happy.

So, do I now pay for love?

For love is not coming my way.

I sat back to think, to mourn, to laugh.

I sat back to know I won’t.

I won’t pay in cash or kind for the sake of love.

For I do not take love as a game.

I was told I was loved,

By a silhouette who never came

to talk straight on the face.

To tell me through the haze.

But, I waited though I did not love.

For a friend in me, I thought existed to accept the love.

But, then the brown eyed, gap in the tooth guy

never came and the game got real sly.

I quietly withdrew, yet the day he left I spoke soft.

Then, I found a face, fell in love.

People said it won’t happen, coz I betrayed one.

And that he was already taken.

If no one talks is it still betrayal for

I do not pay to buy love.

If no one puts it forth,

Can I jump onto the knees?

Will that be sane for the world?

Or will that be the way to pay

to be loved and get love.

The one I loved will never happen for

I have it seems hurt one.

Fine then I say.

Come to me and say

Say if it’s true and not a game

Say if it’s nothing to do with any form of pay.

Say and I may see the truth now and stay.

But say not through hoardings, not through others,

Say through your mouth with a cute gap between your tooth.

Say and I may see the truth now and stay by you,

Who knows how long but long enough to respect your love.

You need not be nasty, need not be a nerd, need

not dress differently to be heard.

Say and I would listen, for smelling it works

It works for me, but saying would work for both.

Let’s sort it out, and if your soul was true as they say.

Let’s talk and see where you could not care more.

If you do not talk I do not go down to harness

an insult or a joke. You made enough fun

of me for no reason. So know, I still

do not pay to love or be loved.

Reach a space either recede or come.

For I have a long way to go then.

I have a long way beyond the one who loved me and whom I loved

If I may say so, for I never have hate and many gates.

I have a long way to go, the bells toll, the praying wheels

Clang calling me their very own.

I must go since there, to love silence I need never pay.

I want to know

I want to know sometime,

What made you twist the plot?

What made you dislike me?

What made you connive against me?

What made your brown eyes hollow?

What made you not talk to me?

What made you feel odd with the Buddha?

What made you sit back in fumes?

What made your smile crooked for me?

I never intended to harm you.

I never intended to warm you.

I never spoke bad about you.

I never tried anything more than being a friend ever.

Friend as the word goes.

For I don’t think you loved.

I am sure you didn’t.

For if you did, as they said,

Was talking so hard, symbology is not my way.

God bless you wide.

It was more twisted than I thought it was

Straighten it, or let it go hide.

Teasing, bullying, fighting was never what

I wanted to do,

For I was counting my days.

I hate

I dislike to hide,

what I feel, but I don’t feel the tide.

I dislike to hate,

But then I do hate at times.

I hate to let unassuming people

Come within, yet I do not

hate friends, once were friends.

I hate to be stabbed at the back,

I hate to be murdered in cold blood.

I hate to not like it all.

I hate to not find it all.

I hate when I say yes and

people take it as “no.”

I hate when I say no and

people take it as Yes.

I hate when people try

to enter through wrong ways.

Every man has a way, so do I.

I hate to say that and this.

Yet, I do not hate none.

I hate none, yet I do not

wish to hate at all.

I hate to be twisted.

I hate to be tossed.

I hate when women are called weak.

I hate when women are pressed down.

I hate when humans take other humans for granted.

I hate when humans live like dead.

I hate when humans die to stay breathing & alive.

The Crescent Moon 🌙 chapter 25

Sometimes we know by smells,

whom we meet?

Sometimes we know by the brown eyes

Who it was?

Sometimes the small gap between teeth

Makes it quite clear.

Sometimes you smell all of it.

Sometimes you smell past smells.

Sometimes you smell questions

Sometimes you smell to know why?

Is it an attempt to begin?

An attempt to end?

But, what was in question?

What was happening?

Questions often don’t get us

anywhere when you have people

around you who do not act like couple

yet try to behave like one.

Is it a desire?

Is a wish?

They don’t know perhaps.

Come out in the open.

Fear not, for I hate none.

A genuine gesture, a kind one,

A caring hand always counts.

Question is how kind, how caring

to what degree? To what extent.

Speaking heart on straight

is the only way to reach hearts.

Speaking is the only way to let

know the good and the bad.

For the smells always tell me all.

It’s just that I prefer brave, strong, genuine souls.

It’s just that you have to stand to talk,

For I never hated anyone, angry yes

You were dumbasses, you do not

see it straight like me. Look straight,

Into the eyes, it was never enmity.

I don’t make enemies.😁😇

The full moon

The moon rises to shine,

The wolves raise their head to whine.

I spent ten years in struggle.

Taming many tails that waggle.

I spent a lot of time knowing good from bad

I spent a lot of time knowing bad from good.

I know there were only a few who knew true respect,

I knew only a few could unfold the drama.

I know I love you,

I know I cannot reach you,

I know you do not take me

when I go, you blocked me

Everywhere, never replied,

Six months I tried. Now also

and forever I love you.

I have no falsity on you, so I tried.

I will live with your shadow

away from the monsters of my past

You alone will be a part,

as unseen as the poetry,

as unseen as the new moon.

I will want to still live with you forever.

Will you keep me with you?

If so, come now as the moon shines.

Not within the walls of your work

But away from it, if you could trust.

I love you quite late, I do not wish to suffice

But wish you could ask me to suffice.

I love you always, yet your walls are too high

for me to climb, I cannot do so.

I know the game, I left the world.

I leave you too here,

If you wish to return you could come,

Only you, rest I have smudged on the wall,

of my mind and they can bother me no more.

Soon, I would write their story,

Their true colours and their awful smells,

hidden in the fictional tale. But, you have not

ended, never will end as they moved out of my life.

I wished

For my grandma

Amidst the dance of furtive chances,

I wished just once, wished to be

with you like the day, to dance with

you in the rain.

I wished to be by your side always,

not like the night creeping quietly like a thief.

I wished to be led by you,

to live and love together.

I wished just once, wished to be.

I sit beneath you, but then my grandma

comes alive, amidst the brown mountains

and the hot soups she told me one day,

her sultry, soothing voice sang a song.

“When you grow up,

You really like someone,

Or love him more than yourself.

Be patient though, never run unto him.

I wished just once, wished to be.

If you do so, you would never know,

If he wants to love you, so wait

by the shore and let him cross the river.

You would live in an age when girls

won’t have time to wait, so they would

swim forward, but remember true love comes

only when the man comes to you.

I wished just once, wished to be.

If he does, you both will live forever together.

But if you cross the river, doubts will live

amidst you forever, doubts raised by the

world, doubts raised by a man’s head.

Who takes half as less time to mistrust a woman.

Do not cross the river even if others do..

If he is yours and he loves you, he would

cross it for you, for he knows you love him.

Let him know though that you love him.”

I wished just once, wished to be.

“If he does not come?” I asked playfully.

“Leave him live his love of life, set him free.”

I ate my soup, and nodded, for I never knew

what she said, until I met you, and as I sat,

the words wafted back and the monks chanted hymns

while the bell gonged and the prayers were sung.

While I let you know I love your medic smells and you frizzy head.

Tears are good!!

Tears are good!!

Tears are good, really they are, indeed.

Tears are better than smiles since they

show you your own, and those who are

pawns of The world, clowns behind the bar.

Tears are a window when your vision

is blur, yet you can see quite clean, crimson

and reds, whites and blues of the green world.

Green in jealousy! Green in the fields.

Tears expose the mockery very well,

It tells you, flint hearts walk wild.

It tells you people bother you,

Not that they love you, but how they hate you.

Tears are good, for they hold up a mirror

to your eyes, in which there is a balm.

How men love to hate.

How they love to despise.

The matadors of today are the

Damnatio ad bestias of yesterday,

For violence runs deep in the veins of man,

Tears are good for they hold up a mirror.

They show you the truth.

They show you the sly,

They show you who cannot be your own.

Which brings you to a heart lighter, after you mourn.